What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
I don't think i like this statement. In fact, i would really like to have a few moments alone with the person who came up with this annoying turn of phrase. What the hell is it supposed to mean anyway? I could cut off one of my arms and, if it didn't kill me, i sure as hell don't think it would make me any stronger than i was with 2 arms. Although i might have one really really strong arm after awhile. But either way, I would probably just wonder for the rest of my life why the hell I cut off my own freaking arm in the first place.
I realize that this statement is based on the concept of being able to carry the baggage that we all have and learn from it. You get through the trials and hardships that life pitches at you and come out a stronger person for it. Well poo on that. I feel that personally, although I have many problems and issues to look forward to, I have learned enough lessons for now and have enough reason to want said lessons to stop for awhile. I want to get off the bus now. Hell, I'll even ride the short bus for a bit if it means that i don't have to get any stronger just yet.
Maybe there is a reason that certain people learn certain lessons before other people do. If there is, can someone please drop me a line and tell me why. Its not as if I would like any of the people I know and love to go through the same life experiences that I have, but sometimes it would be nice to know that I'm not playing this thrilling game of life with weighted dice or a stacked deck. I suppose that life is just a crap shoot and we all get whatever is rolled regardless of the dice. Life is like a box of chocolates. Ya never know what you're gonna get...unless you go through the box and poke the bottoms of all the chocolates so that you know what you are gonna get.

Its funny how dramatically life can change in the space of one breath. If you had asked me 5 years ago what i thought my life would look like today, i wouldn't have thought that it would resemble what it is now. If i look back, i can see hints and signs of what the future held. At the time, i chose to ignore anything that was scary or incomprehensible to my universe regardless of what impact it would create later on. Not unlike driving by a guy holding a sign saying 'the end is near'. As the world is ending a lot of people will have a clear memory of that guy and think 'why didn't i listen?'.

I have, thus far, survived the loss of both my parents to disease, either of the body or the mind. I had the best parents ever. They made me what i am today and though some may argue, myself included, that what i am is not perfect and unacceptable at times, i have to believe that this is the way things were supposed to go. This is the person i am with all the baggage that goes along with being me. I carry it with pride and sometimes with the a little help from my friends and sister. Though i have made huge mistakes in the past and likely will make many more, i have hope that someday my sister and i will figure out what all this loss is for. We are a tiny ragged army that has fought many hard won battles but we are both still here.
Together.